1
00:00:02,452 --> 00:00:06,206
The One Where It All Began
2
00:00:54,012 --> 00:00:57,641
There's nothing to tell.
It's just some guy I work with.
3
00:00:57,892 --> 00:00:59,962
You're going out with a guy.
4
00:01:00,212 --> 00:01:02,521
There's gotta be something
wrong with him.
5
00:01:02,812 --> 00:01:04,723
All right, Joey, be nice.
6
00:01:04,972 --> 00:01:07,532
So does he have a hump
and a hair piece?
7
00:01:09,092 --> 00:01:10,366
Wait. Does he eat chalk?
8
00:01:11,572 --> 00:01:14,644
I don't want her to go
through what I did with Carl.
9
00:01:14,892 --> 00:01:16,405
Okay, everybody relax.
10
00:01:16,652 --> 00:01:18,449
Relax. This is not even a date.
11
00:01:18,692 --> 00:01:22,480
It's just two people going out to
dinner and not having sex.
12
00:01:23,492 --> 00:01:24,971
Sounds like a date to me.
13
00:01:27,812 --> 00:01:30,451
I'm in high school,
in the middle of the cafeteria. . .
14
00:01:30,692 --> 00:01:33,684
. . .and I realize I'm totally naked.
15
00:01:34,132 --> 00:01:35,850
I've had that dream.
16
00:01:36,092 --> 00:01:39,721
Then I look down and I realize
there is a phone. . .
17
00:01:40,692 --> 00:01:42,125
. . .there.
18
00:01:44,412 --> 00:01:46,004
-Instead of--
-That's right!
19
00:01:46,492 --> 00:01:47,811
That one, I've never had.
20
00:01:48,052 --> 00:01:52,204
All of a sudden,
the phone starts to ring.
21
00:01:52,412 --> 00:01:55,290
I don't know what to do.
Everybody's looking at me.
22
00:01:55,532 --> 00:01:57,363
They weren't looking at you before?
23
00:01:58,892 --> 00:02:01,725
Finally, I figure
I'd better answer it.
24
00:02:02,772 --> 00:02:05,332
And it turns out it's my mother.
25
00:02:06,572 --> 00:02:10,326
Which is very, very weird
because she never calls me.
26
00:02:19,812 --> 00:02:22,531
This guy says, ''Hello,''
I wanna kill myself.
27
00:02:23,292 --> 00:02:24,281
You okay, sweetie?
28
00:02:25,332 --> 00:02:29,803
I feel like someone grabbed my small
intestine, pulled it out of my mouth. . .
29
00:02:30,052 --> 00:02:32,725
-. . .and tied it around my neck.
-Cookie?
30
00:02:34,772 --> 00:02:36,171
Carol moved out today.
31
00:02:37,212 --> 00:02:39,328
-Let me get you some coffee.
-Thanks.
32
00:02:43,692 --> 00:02:47,526
No, don't!
Stop cleansing my aura.
33
00:02:48,172 --> 00:02:50,447
Just leave my aura alone, okay?
34
00:02:50,692 --> 00:02:52,922
Fine. Be murky.
35
00:02:53,212 --> 00:02:56,284
I'll be fine.
I hope she'll be very happy.
36
00:02:56,492 --> 00:02:57,447
No, you don't.
37
00:02:57,692 --> 00:02:59,728
To hell with her. She left me!
38
00:03:00,772 --> 00:03:03,127
And you never knew she was a lesbian.
39
00:03:08,812 --> 00:03:11,451
Why does everyone
keep fixating on that?
40
00:03:13,012 --> 00:03:15,526
She didn't know.
How should I know?
41
00:03:17,372 --> 00:03:19,932
Sometimes I wish I was a lesbian.
42
00:03:21,772 --> 00:03:23,728
Did I say that out loud?
43
00:03:26,212 --> 00:03:29,522
I told Mom and Dad last night.
They seemed to take it well.
44
00:03:29,772 --> 00:03:33,970
Really? So that hysterical call I got
from a woman sobbing at 3 a.m. . .
45
00:03:34,212 --> 00:03:36,442
. . . ''I'll never have grandchildren! ''
46
00:03:36,692 --> 00:03:38,728
Was, what? A wrong number?
47
00:03:39,412 --> 00:03:40,731
Sorry.
48
00:03:41,252 --> 00:03:44,164
Look, you're feeling
a lot of pain right now.
49
00:03:44,412 --> 00:03:46,721
You're angry. You're hurting.
50
00:03:46,972 --> 00:03:49,122
Can I tell you what
the answer is?
51
00:03:49,412 --> 00:03:50,606
Strip joints!
52
00:03:52,612 --> 00:03:55,922
Come on, you're single.
Have some hormones.
53
00:03:56,172 --> 00:03:58,322
See, but I don't want
to be single, okay?
54
00:03:58,532 --> 00:04:01,330
I just want to be married again.
55
00:04:05,852 --> 00:04:07,843
And I just want a million dollars!
56
00:04:12,932 --> 00:04:13,921
Rachel?
57
00:04:14,172 --> 00:04:16,561
Oh, God, Monica!
Hi! Thank God!
58
00:04:16,812 --> 00:04:19,724
I went to your building and
this guy with a hammer said. . .
59
00:04:19,932 --> 00:04:22,207
. . .that you might be here and you are.
60
00:04:22,452 --> 00:04:25,524
-Can I get you some coffee?
-Decaf.
61
00:04:26,532 --> 00:04:29,968
Everybody, this is Rachel,
another Lincoln High survivor.
62
00:04:30,172 --> 00:04:32,732
This is everybody.
Chandler and Phoebe. . .
63
00:04:32,972 --> 00:04:35,167
. . .and Joey. And remember
my brother, Ross?
64
00:04:35,412 --> 00:04:36,322
Sure!
65
00:04:46,012 --> 00:04:50,130
You want to tell us now, or are we
waiting for four wet bridesmaids?
66
00:04:51,532 --> 00:04:56,128
Oh, God! Well, it started about
a half-hour before the wedding.
67
00:04:56,372 --> 00:04:58,840
I was in this room with
all the presents. . .
68
00:04:59,092 --> 00:05:01,128
. . .and I was looking
at this gravy boat.
69
00:05:01,332 --> 00:05:04,722
This really gorgeous
Limoges gravy boat.
70
00:05:04,932 --> 00:05:07,321
When all of a sudden I realize--
Sweet 'N Low?
71
00:05:07,732 --> 00:05:09,848
I realized. . .
72
00:05:10,092 --> 00:05:13,687
. . .I was more turned on by
this gravy boat than by Barry.
73
00:05:13,892 --> 00:05:16,565
And then I really freaked out,
when it hit me:
74
00:05:16,812 --> 00:05:19,326
How much Barry looks like
Mr. Potato Head.
75
00:05:20,172 --> 00:05:22,925
I always knew he looked
familiar, but. . . .
76
00:05:25,692 --> 00:05:28,923
I had to get out of there,
and I started wondering. . .
77
00:05:29,132 --> 00:05:32,602
. . . ''Why am I doing this?''
and ''Who am I doing this for?''
78
00:05:32,852 --> 00:05:37,050
I didn't know where to go, and I know
you and I have drifted apart. . .
79
00:05:37,292 --> 00:05:39,931
. . .but you're the only person
I know in the city.
80
00:05:40,132 --> 00:05:41,770
Who wasn't asked to the wedding.
81
00:05:42,092 --> 00:05:44,925
I was kind of hoping that
wouldn't be an issue.
82
00:06:00,172 --> 00:06:02,242
I guess he bought her
the pipe organ. . .
83
00:06:02,492 --> 00:06:04,926
. . .and she's really not
happy about it.
84
00:06:06,412 --> 00:06:07,481
''Tuna or egg salad?''
85
00:06:07,732 --> 00:06:08,847
''Decide! ''
86
00:06:10,492 --> 00:06:13,723
''I'll have whatever
Christine is having. ''
87
00:06:15,132 --> 00:06:18,169
Daddy, I just--
I can't marry him.
88
00:06:18,692 --> 00:06:20,171
I'm sorry.
89
00:06:20,412 --> 00:06:22,926
I just don't love him.
90
00:06:23,612 --> 00:06:25,682
Well, it matters to me!
91
00:06:29,252 --> 00:06:33,325
''If I let go of my hair,
my head will fall off. ''
92
00:06:34,772 --> 00:06:37,445
She should not be
wearing those pants.
93
00:06:38,772 --> 00:06:40,763
I say push her down the stairs!
94
00:06:41,012 --> 00:06:43,606
Push her down the stairs!
Push her down the stairs!
95
00:06:47,692 --> 00:06:49,444
Come on, Daddy, listen!
96
00:06:50,892 --> 00:06:54,487
All my life, everyone's
always told me, ''You're a shoe! ''
97
00:06:55,132 --> 00:06:57,407
''You're a shoe! You're a shoe!
You're a shoe! ''
98
00:06:57,652 --> 00:07:00,564
I stopped and said,
''What if I don't wanna be a shoe?
99
00:07:00,812 --> 00:07:04,248
What if I want to be a purse?
100
00:07:04,452 --> 00:07:05,726
Or a hat?''
101
00:07:06,732 --> 00:07:09,041
I don't want you to buy me a hat,
I--
102
00:07:09,292 --> 00:07:11,328
It's a metaphor, Daddy!
103
00:07:13,012 --> 00:07:15,321
You can see where he'd have trouble.
104
00:07:17,932 --> 00:07:19,763
Look, Daddy, it's my life.
105
00:07:21,412 --> 00:07:24,324
Well, maybe I'll just stay
here with Monica.
106
00:07:26,372 --> 00:07:29,330
I guess we've established
she's staying with Monica.
107
00:07:30,292 --> 00:07:32,522
Well, maybe that's my decision.
108
00:07:33,612 --> 00:07:35,728
Well, maybe I don't need your money.
109
00:07:35,932 --> 00:07:37,729
Wait! Wait! I said maybe!
110
00:07:45,892 --> 00:07:48,565
Just breathe.
Breathe, that's it.
111
00:07:48,812 --> 00:07:51,121
Just try to think
of nice, calm things.
112
00:07:51,572 --> 00:07:55,042
Raindrops on roses
And whiskers on kittens
113
00:07:55,292 --> 00:07:59,205
Doorbells and sleigh bells
And something with mittens
114
00:07:59,972 --> 00:08:03,362
La la la something
And noodles with string
115
00:08:03,612 --> 00:08:05,728
-These are a--
-I'm all better now.
116
00:08:07,612 --> 00:08:09,125
I helped.
117
00:08:11,172 --> 00:08:13,447
This is probably for
the best, you know?
118
00:08:14,292 --> 00:08:16,852
Independence.
Taking control of your life.
119
00:08:17,092 --> 00:08:18,650
The whole ''hat'' thing.
120
00:08:18,892 --> 00:08:23,044
If you need anything,
you can always come to Joey.
121
00:08:23,292 --> 00:08:26,443
Me and Chandler live across the hall.
And he's away a lot.
122
00:08:28,292 --> 00:08:30,726
Joey, stop hitting on her!
It's her wedding day.
123
00:08:30,972 --> 00:08:33,532
What? Like there's
a rule or something?
124
00:08:36,212 --> 00:08:37,327
I got it.
125
00:08:38,692 --> 00:08:41,923
Please don't do that again.
It's a horrible sound.
126
00:08:42,172 --> 00:08:43,730
It's Paul.
127
00:08:43,972 --> 00:08:47,248
Oh, God. Is it 6:30?
Buzz him in.
128
00:08:47,492 --> 00:08:49,926
-Who's Paul?
-Paul, the wine guy?
129
00:08:50,132 --> 00:08:50,928
Maybe.
130
00:08:51,172 --> 00:08:54,289
Your ''not a real date,''
is with Paul, the wine guy?
131
00:08:54,532 --> 00:08:56,409
He finally asked you out?
132
00:08:56,612 --> 00:08:58,091
It's a ''Dear Diary'' moment.
133
00:08:59,572 --> 00:09:01,005
Rach, I can cancel.
134
00:09:01,252 --> 00:09:03,607
Oh, God. Please, no.
Go, I'll be fine.
135
00:09:03,852 --> 00:09:06,446
Ross are you okay?
Do you want me to stay?
136
00:09:07,812 --> 00:09:09,325
That'd be good.
137
00:09:11,612 --> 00:09:15,287
-Really?
-Go on! It's Paul, the wine guy!
138
00:09:16,012 --> 00:09:19,925
Does he sell it, drink it,
or he just complains a lot?
139
00:09:21,332 --> 00:09:23,562
Hi, come in! Paul, this is. . .
140
00:09:24,492 --> 00:09:26,847
. . .everybody.
Everybody, this is Paul.
141
00:09:28,532 --> 00:09:32,161
-The wine guy.
-I didn't catch your name. Paul?
142
00:09:33,812 --> 00:09:36,804
I'll be right back.
I've just got to go a--
143
00:09:37,092 --> 00:09:38,923
A-wandering?
144
00:09:39,612 --> 00:09:43,127
Change. Sit down.
Two seconds.
145
00:09:46,972 --> 00:09:50,328
I just pulled out four eyelashes.
That can't be good.
146
00:09:54,892 --> 00:09:57,042
Hey, Paul. Here's a little tip.
147
00:09:57,292 --> 00:10:00,250
She likes it when you
rub her neck in the same spot. . .
148
00:10:00,492 --> 00:10:03,689
. . .over and over again, till
it starts to get a little red.
149
00:10:04,812 --> 00:10:06,723
Shut up, Joey!
150
00:10:08,612 --> 00:10:10,443
Rachel, what are you
up to tonight?
151
00:10:11,212 --> 00:10:14,966
I was supposed to be headed
for Aruba on my honeymoon. . .
152
00:10:15,212 --> 00:10:16,725
. . .so, nothing.
153
00:10:18,492 --> 00:10:21,529
Right. You're not even
getting your honeymoon.
154
00:10:21,772 --> 00:10:26,323
Although, Aruba. This time of year?
Talk about your. . .
155
00:10:27,372 --> 00:10:28,771
. . .big lizards.
156
00:10:32,972 --> 00:10:35,611
If you don't feel
like being alone tonight. . .
157
00:10:35,852 --> 00:10:38,730
. . .Joey and Chandler are
helping me with my furniture.
158
00:10:38,932 --> 00:10:41,321
And we're very excited about it.
159
00:10:42,172 --> 00:10:45,005
Thanks. But I'm just gonna
hang out here.
160
00:10:45,212 --> 00:10:47,521
-It's been a long day.
-Okay. Sure.
161
00:10:47,732 --> 00:10:48,687
Pheebs, wanna help?
162
00:10:49,012 --> 00:10:51,207
I wish I could, but I don't want to.
163
00:11:02,972 --> 00:11:05,725
Love is sweet as summer showers
164
00:11:05,932 --> 00:11:08,651
Love is a wondrous work of art
165
00:11:08,892 --> 00:11:13,807
But your love, oh, your love
Your love
166
00:11:14,692 --> 00:11:17,729
Is like a giant pigeon
167
00:11:19,092 --> 00:11:21,447
Crapping on my heart
168
00:11:24,932 --> 00:11:26,331
Thank you!
169
00:11:35,012 --> 00:11:38,971
I'm supposed to attach a bracket-y
thing to the side things. . .
170
00:11:39,212 --> 00:11:42,522
. . .using a bunch of these
little worm guys.
171
00:11:43,092 --> 00:11:47,529
I have no bracket-y thing.
I see no worm guys whatsoever. . .
172
00:11:47,772 --> 00:11:50,650
. . .and I cannot feel my legs.
173
00:11:53,812 --> 00:11:54,961
We got a bookcase here.
174
00:11:55,212 --> 00:11:57,123
It's a beautiful thing.
175
00:11:58,012 --> 00:11:59,240
What's this?
176
00:11:59,492 --> 00:12:02,882
I would have to say that is
an L-shaped bracket.
177
00:12:04,692 --> 00:12:08,526
-Which goes where?
-I have no idea.
178
00:12:10,492 --> 00:12:12,687
-Done with the bookcase.
-All finished.
179
00:12:16,612 --> 00:12:19,126
This was Carol's favorite beer.
180
00:12:20,532 --> 00:12:23,524
She always drank it out of the can.
I should have known.
181
00:12:27,292 --> 00:12:29,567
If you start with that,
we're out of here.
182
00:12:29,772 --> 00:12:32,605
Please don't spoil all this fun.
183
00:12:32,812 --> 00:12:34,086
Let me ask you a question.
184
00:12:34,332 --> 00:12:38,530
She got the furniture,
the stereo, the good TV.
185
00:12:38,732 --> 00:12:39,767
What did you get?
186
00:12:40,612 --> 00:12:41,522
You guys.
187
00:12:41,732 --> 00:12:43,563
-You got screwed.
-Oh, my God.
188
00:12:43,812 --> 00:12:48,328
-Oh, my God.
-I know. I'm such an idiot.
189
00:12:48,532 --> 00:12:52,764
I should've caught on when she went to
the dentist four and five times a week.
190
00:12:53,012 --> 00:12:55,082
I mean, how clean can teeth get?
191
00:12:55,292 --> 00:12:57,522
My brother's going through that.
He's a mess.
192
00:12:57,732 --> 00:12:59,165
How did you get through it?
193
00:12:59,412 --> 00:13:02,768
He might try accidentally breaking
something valuable of hers.
194
00:13:03,012 --> 00:13:04,286
-Say her--
-Leg?
195
00:13:04,492 --> 00:13:06,483
That's one way of going through it.
196
00:13:07,092 --> 00:13:08,491
Me, I went for the watch.
197
00:13:09,132 --> 00:13:13,410
You actually broke her watch?
The worst thing I ever did was. . .
198
00:13:13,652 --> 00:13:16,530
. . .I shredded my old boyfriend's
favorite bath towel.
199
00:13:16,772 --> 00:13:19,411
-Steer clear of you!
-That's right.
200
00:13:20,012 --> 00:13:22,970
Barry, I'm sorry.
I am so sorry.
201
00:13:23,212 --> 00:13:28,127
You probably think it's about making
love with your socks on, but it isn't.
202
00:13:28,412 --> 00:13:30,926
It's about me.
And I just--
203
00:13:37,532 --> 00:13:40,285
Machine cut me off again.
Anyway. . . .
204
00:13:44,972 --> 00:13:49,762
I know that some girl is going to be
lucky to become Mr. Barry Finkel.
205
00:13:50,012 --> 00:13:53,163
But it isn't me.
It's not me.
206
00:13:53,412 --> 00:13:58,327
Not that I have any idea who ''me'' is
right now, but give me a chance to--
207
00:14:00,412 --> 00:14:01,811
I'm divorced!
208
00:14:02,052 --> 00:14:03,963
I'm only 26 and I'm divorced.
209
00:14:04,212 --> 00:14:06,123
Shut up.
210
00:14:12,412 --> 00:14:14,528
That only took me an hour.
211
00:14:15,692 --> 00:14:20,322
Between us, we haven't had a
relationship last longer than a Mento.
212
00:14:23,292 --> 00:14:26,489
You, however, have had the love
of a woman for four years.
213
00:14:26,732 --> 00:14:29,929
Four years of closeness and sharing.
214
00:14:30,132 --> 00:14:31,850
After which,
she ripped your heart out. . .
215
00:14:32,092 --> 00:14:34,322
. . .and that is why we don't do it.
216
00:14:35,692 --> 00:14:37,922
I don't think that was my point.
217
00:14:39,212 --> 00:14:43,125
You know what's scary? What if there
is only one woman for everybody?
218
00:14:43,372 --> 00:14:46,523
I mean, what if you get one
woman, and that's it?
219
00:14:46,732 --> 00:14:51,408
Unfortunately, in my case,
there was only one woman for her.
220
00:14:53,212 --> 00:14:56,329
What are you talking about?
One woman.
221
00:14:57,092 --> 00:15:00,368
That's like saying there's only
one flavor of ice cream for you.
222
00:15:00,612 --> 00:15:04,321
Let me tell you something.
There's lots of flavors out there.
223
00:15:04,572 --> 00:15:08,611
Rocky road, and cookie dough,
and bing cherry vanilla.
224
00:15:09,292 --> 00:15:13,683
You can get them with jimmies,
or nuts, or whipped cream.
225
00:15:13,892 --> 00:15:16,326
This is the best thing that
ever happened to you!
226
00:15:16,572 --> 00:15:19,245
You got married. You were
like, what? Eight?
227
00:15:21,212 --> 00:15:24,921
Welcome back to the world.
Grab a spoon!
228
00:15:25,172 --> 00:15:27,561
I honestly don't know
if I'm hungry or horny.
229
00:15:28,132 --> 00:15:29,929
Then stay out of my freezer.
230
00:15:33,412 --> 00:15:36,643
Ever since she
walked out on me, I. . . .
231
00:15:36,892 --> 00:15:38,769
What? What?
232
00:15:39,012 --> 00:15:41,242
You wanna spell it out with noodles?
233
00:15:41,492 --> 00:15:44,882
It's more of a fifth date
kind of revelation.
234
00:15:46,172 --> 00:15:49,050
So there's going to be a fifth date?
235
00:15:50,452 --> 00:15:51,248
Isn't there?
236
00:15:52,332 --> 00:15:54,368
Yeah, yeah. I think there is.
237
00:15:55,372 --> 00:15:57,328
What were you going to say?
238
00:16:02,532 --> 00:16:04,682
Ever since she left me. . .
239
00:16:05,892 --> 00:16:07,962
. . .I haven't been able to perform. . .
240
00:16:09,132 --> 00:16:10,531
. . .sexually.
241
00:16:13,212 --> 00:16:14,611
Oh, God! Oh, God!
242
00:16:14,852 --> 00:16:15,921
I'm so sorry.
243
00:16:16,172 --> 00:16:19,528
Being spit on is probably
not what you need right now.
244
00:16:21,732 --> 00:16:22,608
How long?
245
00:16:23,372 --> 00:16:24,168
Two years.
246
00:16:26,772 --> 00:16:29,525
I'm glad you smashed her watch.
247
00:16:31,492 --> 00:16:34,723
So you still think you might
want that fifth date?
248
00:16:39,332 --> 00:16:40,731
Yeah, I do.
249
00:16:42,012 --> 00:16:43,923
We are gathered here
to join together...
250
00:16:44,412 --> 00:16:46,642
...Joanie Louise Cunningham...
251
00:16:46,892 --> 00:16:51,329
...and Charles Chachi,
Chachi, Chachi...
252
00:16:52,732 --> 00:16:55,371
...in the bonds of holy matrimony.
253
00:16:55,612 --> 00:16:57,921
-Marriage is the most sacred--
-See!
254
00:16:58,172 --> 00:17:02,723
But Joanie loved Chachi.
That's the difference.
255
00:17:04,692 --> 00:17:06,410
''Grab a spoon. ''
256
00:17:06,612 --> 00:17:09,843
Do you know long it's been
since I grabbed a spoon?
257
00:17:10,092 --> 00:17:13,323
Do the words, ''Billy, don't be a
hero,'' mean anything to you?
258
00:17:17,812 --> 00:17:20,201
Great story. But I gotta go.
259
00:17:20,932 --> 00:17:22,285
I got a date with Andrea.
260
00:17:22,532 --> 00:17:25,524
Angela. Andrea. Oh, man.
261
00:17:25,772 --> 00:17:29,003
Andrea's the screamer.
Angela has cats.
262
00:17:29,252 --> 00:17:32,244
Right, thanks. It's Julie.
I'm out of here.
263
00:17:35,012 --> 00:17:39,528
You know, here's the thing. Even if
I could get it together enough. . .
264
00:17:39,772 --> 00:17:41,524
. . .to ask a woman out. . .
265
00:17:42,412 --> 00:17:44,528
. . .who am I going to ask?
266
00:18:06,292 --> 00:18:07,520
Isn't this amazing?
267
00:18:07,732 --> 00:18:09,962
I have never made coffee
before in my life.
268
00:18:10,212 --> 00:18:12,601
-That is amazing.
-Congratulations.
269
00:18:12,852 --> 00:18:16,242
I figure if I can make coffee,
there isn't anything I can't do.
270
00:18:16,892 --> 00:18:21,124
I think it's, ''If I can invade Poland,
there isn't anything I can't do. ''
271
00:18:22,012 --> 00:18:26,130
If you feel like you gotta make
a Western omelet or something. . . .
272
00:18:29,372 --> 00:18:31,761
Although, actually
I'm really not that hungry.
273
00:18:33,572 --> 00:18:35,802
Oh, good.
Lenny and Squiggy are here.
274
00:18:37,612 --> 00:18:39,443
-Good morning.
-Good morning.
275
00:18:41,532 --> 00:18:43,170
-Morning.
-Morning, Paul.
276
00:18:43,412 --> 00:18:46,131
-Hello, Paul.
-Hi. Paul, is it?
277
00:18:52,932 --> 00:18:54,160
Thank you.
278
00:18:54,412 --> 00:18:55,811
-Thank you so much.
-Stop!
279
00:18:56,052 --> 00:18:57,371
Last night was like. . .
280
00:18:58,292 --> 00:19:02,968
. . .all my birthdays, graduations, plus
the barn-raising scene in Witness.
281
00:19:08,732 --> 00:19:11,326
We'll talk later.
282
00:19:15,132 --> 00:19:16,531
Thank you.
283
00:19:23,572 --> 00:19:25,722
That wasn't a real date.
284
00:19:26,892 --> 00:19:29,326
What the hell do you do
on a real date?
285
00:19:31,012 --> 00:19:33,128
Shut up and put my table back.
286
00:19:34,532 --> 00:19:36,250
I've got to get to work.
287
00:19:36,492 --> 00:19:41,327
If I don't input those numbers,
it doesn't make much of a difference.
288
00:19:44,772 --> 00:19:47,127
So, like, you guys all have jobs?
289
00:19:48,292 --> 00:19:49,964
Yeah, we all have jobs.
290
00:19:50,212 --> 00:19:52,680
That's how we buy stuff.
291
00:19:54,852 --> 00:19:56,126
Yeah, I'm an actor.
292
00:19:56,572 --> 00:19:58,722
Have I seen you in anything?
293
00:19:58,972 --> 00:20:01,167
I doubt it.
Mostly regional work.
294
00:20:01,412 --> 00:20:05,041
Unless you happen to catch the
Wee One's production of Pinocchio...
295
00:20:05,252 --> 00:20:07,322
. . .at the Little Theater in the Park.
296
00:20:07,812 --> 00:20:09,211
It was a job, all right?
297
00:20:09,612 --> 00:20:12,922
''Look, Geppeto. I'm a real live boy. ''
298
00:20:14,892 --> 00:20:16,564
I will not take this abuse.
299
00:20:16,812 --> 00:20:18,723
You're right. I'm sorry.
300
00:20:18,932 --> 00:20:21,924
Once I was a wooden boy
A little wooden boy
301
00:20:23,412 --> 00:20:25,880
You should both know that
he's a dead man.
302
00:20:27,772 --> 00:20:29,330
Oh, Chandler!
303
00:20:32,012 --> 00:20:34,207
How are you doing today?
You sleep okay?
304
00:20:34,452 --> 00:20:37,922
Did you talk to Barry?
I can't stop smiling.
305
00:20:38,412 --> 00:20:41,722
I see that. You look like you
slept with a hanger in your mouth.
306
00:20:47,172 --> 00:20:50,050
I know. He's just so--
307
00:20:50,292 --> 00:20:52,089
Remember you and Tony De Marco?
308
00:20:53,612 --> 00:20:56,331
Well, it's like that.
With feelings.
309
00:20:58,372 --> 00:21:00,681
-Are you in trouble!
-Big time!
310
00:21:01,172 --> 00:21:03,242
Want a wedding dress?
Hardly used.
311
00:21:04,572 --> 00:21:07,325
We're getting a little
ahead of ourselves here.
312
00:21:08,132 --> 00:21:12,922
I'm going to get up, go to work,
and not think about him all day.
313
00:21:13,412 --> 00:21:16,131
Or else I'm just going
to get up and go to work.
314
00:21:16,372 --> 00:21:18,010
-Wish me luck!
-What for?
315
00:21:18,252 --> 00:21:21,403
I'm gonna go get one
of those job things.
316
00:21:32,212 --> 00:21:34,567
-Hey, Monica.
-Hey, Franny. Welcome back.
317
00:21:34,812 --> 00:21:36,245
How was Florida?
318
00:21:36,492 --> 00:21:38,722
You had sex, didn't you?
319
00:21:39,812 --> 00:21:40,608
How do you do that?
320
00:21:40,852 --> 00:21:43,525
I hate you. I'm pushing my
aunt through Parrot Jungle. . .
321
00:21:43,772 --> 00:21:45,205
. . .and you're having sex.
322
00:21:46,012 --> 00:21:48,924
So, who?
323
00:21:49,532 --> 00:21:50,931
You know Paul?
324
00:21:51,132 --> 00:21:52,929
Paul, the wine guy?
325
00:21:53,132 --> 00:21:54,360
Yeah, I know Paul.
326
00:21:56,892 --> 00:21:59,247
You mean, you know Paul
like I know Paul?
327
00:21:59,492 --> 00:22:01,687
Are you kidding?
I take credit for Paul.
328
00:22:01,892 --> 00:22:05,726
Before me, there was no snap in his
turtle for two years.
329
00:22:08,972 --> 00:22:11,327
Of course it was a line.
330
00:22:11,692 --> 00:22:14,286
Why? Why would anybody
do something like that?
331
00:22:14,532 --> 00:22:17,524
We're looking for an answer
more sophisticated than. . .
332
00:22:17,732 --> 00:22:19,529
. . . ''To get you into bed. ''
333
00:22:20,812 --> 00:22:22,962
I hate men. I hate men!
334
00:22:23,212 --> 00:22:25,806
Don't hate. Don't put that out
in the universe.
335
00:22:27,412 --> 00:22:28,765
Is it me?
336
00:22:29,012 --> 00:22:32,527
Is it like I have some sort of
beacon that only dogs. . .
337
00:22:32,772 --> 00:22:35,161
. . .and men with emotional
problems can hear?
338
00:22:35,412 --> 00:22:37,209
Come here.
Give me your feet.
339
00:22:44,492 --> 00:22:46,642
I just thought he was
nice, you know?
340
00:22:50,692 --> 00:22:53,923
I can't believe you
didn't know it was a line.
341
00:22:57,652 --> 00:22:58,448
Guess what?
342
00:22:58,732 --> 00:23:00,529
-You got a job?
-Are you kidding?
343
00:23:00,732 --> 00:23:02,404
I'm trained for nothing.
344
00:23:04,172 --> 00:23:06,083
I was laughed out of 12 interviews.
345
00:23:06,332 --> 00:23:07,765
You're surprisingly upbeat.
346
00:23:08,012 --> 00:23:11,322
You would be too if you found
Joan and David boots on sale. . .
347
00:23:11,572 --> 00:23:13,210
. . .50% percent off.
348
00:23:13,452 --> 00:23:15,170
How well you know me.
349
00:23:17,452 --> 00:23:19,761
They're my, ''I don't need
a job or my parents.
350
00:23:20,012 --> 00:23:22,003
I've got great boots,'' boots.
351
00:23:23,532 --> 00:23:25,443
-How did you pay for them?
-Credit card.
352
00:23:26,012 --> 00:23:27,604
And who pays for that?
353
00:23:28,212 --> 00:23:30,203
My father.
354
00:23:33,692 --> 00:23:35,523
Come on, is this necessary?
355
00:23:35,732 --> 00:23:37,563
I can stop charging any time I want.
356
00:23:37,812 --> 00:23:39,768
You can't live off your parents.
357
00:23:40,012 --> 00:23:43,561
I know that. That's why
I was getting married.
358
00:23:43,812 --> 00:23:47,282
Give her a break. It's hard being
on your own for the first time.
359
00:23:47,772 --> 00:23:49,125
-Thank you.
-You're welcome.
360
00:23:49,332 --> 00:23:51,971
When I first came to
this city, I was 1 4.
361
00:23:52,172 --> 00:23:54,970
My mom had killed herself
and my stepdad was in prison.
362
00:23:55,212 --> 00:23:57,123
And I got here,
and I didn't know anybody.
363
00:23:57,372 --> 00:24:01,763
I ended up living with this albino
guy who was cleaning windshields.
364
00:24:02,012 --> 00:24:03,604
And then he killed himself.
365
00:24:03,852 --> 00:24:08,209
Then I found aromatherapy. Believe
me, I know exactly how you feel.
366
00:24:11,572 --> 00:24:13,927
The word you're looking for is:
367
00:24:14,612 --> 00:24:15,761
''Anyway. . . . ''
368
00:24:20,772 --> 00:24:21,966
You ready?
369
00:24:22,212 --> 00:24:24,407
No, I'm not ready.
How can I be ready?
370
00:24:24,652 --> 00:24:27,246
''You ready to jump out of
the plane without a chute?''
371
00:24:27,492 --> 00:24:28,481
I can't do this.
372
00:24:28,732 --> 00:24:30,723
-I know you can.
-I don't think so.
373
00:24:30,972 --> 00:24:33,532
You made coffee.
You can do anything.
374
00:24:36,212 --> 00:24:38,009
Cut, cut, cut.
375
00:24:42,972 --> 00:24:44,530
You know what?
376
00:24:44,772 --> 00:24:48,401
We can just leave it at that.
Like a symbolic gesture.
377
00:24:48,652 --> 00:24:50,449
That was a library card.
378
00:24:56,932 --> 00:25:01,528
If you listen very closely, you can
hear a thousand retailers scream.
379
00:25:04,612 --> 00:25:06,170
Welcome to the real world!
380
00:25:06,412 --> 00:25:08,926
It sucks.
You're gonna love it.
381
00:25:17,092 --> 00:25:18,923
That's it.
382
00:25:19,172 --> 00:25:20,525
You gonna crash on the couch?
383
00:25:20,772 --> 00:25:24,526
-No, I gotta go home sometime.
-Are you gonna be okay?
384
00:25:26,172 --> 00:25:27,810
Look what I just
found on the floor.
385
00:25:29,972 --> 00:25:30,961
What?
386
00:25:31,612 --> 00:25:33,250
That's Paul's watch.
387
00:25:33,492 --> 00:25:35,926
You can just put it back
where you found it.
388
00:25:36,812 --> 00:25:38,928
Oh, boy! All right.
389
00:25:39,492 --> 00:25:41,722
-Good night, everybody.
-Good night.
390
00:25:52,372 --> 00:25:53,168
-I'm sorry.
-No!
391
00:25:53,412 --> 00:25:55,926
-No, have it, really.
-Split it?
392
00:26:00,932 --> 00:26:04,720
You probably didn't know this,
but back in high school I had. . .
393
00:26:04,932 --> 00:26:06,968
. . .a major crush on you.
394
00:26:08,412 --> 00:26:09,527
I knew.
395
00:26:09,932 --> 00:26:11,331
You did?
396
00:26:13,092 --> 00:26:16,402
I figured you thought I was
Monica's geeky older brother.
397
00:26:16,612 --> 00:26:17,931
I did.
398
00:26:22,812 --> 00:26:24,564
Listen, do you think--
399
00:26:24,812 --> 00:26:28,930
And try not to let my vulnerability
become any kind of a factor here.
400
00:26:30,132 --> 00:26:33,920
Do you think it would be okay if
I asked you out sometime, maybe?
401
00:26:37,212 --> 00:26:38,440
Maybe.
402
00:26:45,812 --> 00:26:47,723
Okay, maybe I will.
403
00:26:51,932 --> 00:26:53,729
-Good night.
-Good night.
404
00:27:07,612 --> 00:27:08,931
See you.
405
00:27:11,132 --> 00:27:12,042
Wait, wait.
406
00:27:12,292 --> 00:27:13,361
What's with you?
407
00:27:16,012 --> 00:27:18,128
I just grabbed a spoon.
408
00:27:26,692 --> 00:27:28,205
I can't believe what
I'm hearing.
409
00:27:28,452 --> 00:27:30,010
I can 't believe
What I'm hearing
410
00:27:30,252 --> 00:27:32,322
-What? I said you had--
-What? I said you had--
411
00:27:33,252 --> 00:27:34,048
Would you stop?
412
00:27:34,772 --> 00:27:36,524
Was I doing it again?
413
00:27:38,412 --> 00:27:42,644
I said that you had a nice butt.
It's just not a great butt.
414
00:27:43,012 --> 00:27:45,606
You wouldn't know a great
butt if it bit you.
415
00:27:45,852 --> 00:27:47,331
There's an image.
416
00:27:49,612 --> 00:27:51,523
Would anybody like more coffee?
417
00:27:53,372 --> 00:27:55,044
Did you make it?
418
00:27:55,812 --> 00:27:58,531
-I'm just serving it.
-I'll have a cup of coffee.
419
00:27:59,412 --> 00:28:00,686
Kids, new dream.
420
00:28:00,932 --> 00:28:02,047
I'm in Las Vegas.
421
00:28:02,292 --> 00:28:03,486
Miss, more coffee?
422
00:28:05,212 --> 00:28:08,329
Excuse me? Could you give this
to that guy over there?
423
00:28:09,332 --> 00:28:10,651
Go ahead.
424
00:28:10,892 --> 00:28:12,007
Thank you.
425
00:28:12,212 --> 00:28:14,328
Sorry. Okay, Las Vegas.
426
00:28:14,572 --> 00:28:16,290
So I'm in Las Vegas.
427
00:28:17,892 --> 00:28:19,530
I'm Liza Minnelli.
|
1
00:00:01,948 --> 00:00:05,406
Эпизод, где всё началось.
2
00:00:55,769 --> 00:00:59,603
Да нечего рассказывать!
Просто парень с работы.
3
00:00:59,806 --> 00:01:01,933
Ладно тебе, ты же на свидание
с ним собралась!
4
00:01:02,142 --> 00:01:04,736
С ним что-то должно быть не так.
5
00:01:04,945 --> 00:01:07,004
Джоуи, веди себя прилично.
6
00:01:07,180 --> 00:01:09,705
Так у него горб? И парик в придачу?
7
00:01:11,518 --> 00:01:13,952
Погодите, я знаю – он ест мел?
8
00:01:14,121 --> 00:01:17,420
Ну, знаете, я просто не хочу, чтобы она
пережила то же, что я с Карлом… Ой!
9
00:01:17,591 --> 00:01:21,687
Ладно вам, успокойтесь.
Это даже не свидание.
10
00:01:21,862 --> 00:01:26,231
Просто двое молодых людей идут
поужинать вместе — без секса.
11
00:01:26,466 --> 00:01:29,560
У меня все свидания такие.
12
00:01:31,405 --> 00:01:33,839
Ну вот, я снова старшеклассник,
стою посреди столовой...
13
00:01:34,007 --> 00:01:37,238
...и вдруг понимаю,
что я полностью голый.
14
00:01:37,444 --> 00:01:39,105
Да, да. Нам тоже это снилось.
15
00:01:39,646 --> 00:01:43,104
Значит, смотрю я вниз и вижу,
что у меня телефон...
16
00:01:44,451 --> 00:01:46,544
...там
17
00:01:48,255 --> 00:01:50,052
- Вместо...?
- Вот именно!
18
00:01:50,457 --> 00:01:51,788
Такое мне не снилось.
19
00:01:51,958 --> 00:01:56,554
И вдруг внезапно телефон начинает звонить
20
00:01:56,763 --> 00:01:59,755
Я не знаю, что делать,
все смотрят на меня
21
00:01:59,966 --> 00:02:02,526
А до того не смотрели?
22
00:02:03,503 --> 00:02:07,269
Наконец я догадываюсь,
что лучше будет ответить
23
00:02:07,474 --> 00:02:11,274
И оказывается, что это моя мать
24
00:02:11,478 --> 00:02:15,437
И это-то и есть самое странное,
потому что она никогда мне не звонит!
25
00:02:20,654 --> 00:02:22,952
Привет...
26
00:02:25,192 --> 00:02:27,820
Когда он здоровается,
мне в ответ хочется повеситься.
27
00:02:28,929 --> 00:02:29,987
Ты в порядке?
28
00:02:30,897 --> 00:02:35,561
Я чувствую себя будто кто-то
вытащил мои кишки через рот...
29
00:02:35,769 --> 00:02:40,206
- и обмотал вокруг шеи...
- Печеньку?
30
00:02:40,707 --> 00:02:43,301
Кэрол сегодня переехала,
и вещи забрала
31
00:02:43,477 --> 00:02:46,742
- Давай-ка я тебе кофейку принесу.
- Спасибо.
32
00:02:50,116 --> 00:02:55,213
Нет, не надо!
Хватит чистить мне ауру!
33
00:02:55,422 --> 00:03:00,052
- Оставь мою ауру в покое, ладно?
- Ладно, сиди грязный.
34
00:03:00,460 --> 00:03:04,021
- Надеюсь, она будет счастлива.
- Нет, не надеешься.
35
00:03:04,231 --> 00:03:07,632
Нет, не надеюсь, к чёрту её.
Это она меня бросила!
36
00:03:07,834 --> 00:03:10,598
А ты правда не знал,
что она лесбиянка?
37
00:03:13,940 --> 00:03:15,931
Нет!!! Все, ладно?!
38
00:03:16,209 --> 00:03:19,144
Чего вы все на этом
зациклились?
39
00:03:20,714 --> 00:03:24,241
Как я мог знать,
если она сама не знала?
40
00:03:25,285 --> 00:03:29,244
Иногда мне жаль,
что я не лесбиянка...
41
00:03:29,823 --> 00:03:32,018
Я что, это вслух
сказал?
42
00:03:34,261 --> 00:03:38,095
Вчера вечером я рассказал маме и папе.
Они вроде приняли это нормально.
43
00:03:38,298 --> 00:03:39,287
Да ну?
44
00:03:39,499 --> 00:03:43,128
Так эта дама, которая звонила
в 3 часа ночи и рыдала...
45
00:03:43,336 --> 00:03:47,966
..."У меня никогда не будет внуков!"
Это было что? Ошиблись номером?
46
00:03:48,208 --> 00:03:49,197
Прости.
47
00:03:49,409 --> 00:03:53,209
Послушай, Росс, сейчас
тебе очень больно.
48
00:03:53,413 --> 00:03:56,041
Ты сердишься.
Ты страдаешь.
49
00:03:56,249 --> 00:03:58,479
Хочешь, подскажу
решение?
50
00:03:58,652 --> 00:03:59,949
Стриптиз!
51
00:04:02,088 --> 00:04:04,488
Ты же теперь свободен!
Пойди, тряхни гормонами.
52
00:04:05,659 --> 00:04:07,889
Но я не хочу быть
свободным, ясно?
53
00:04:08,094 --> 00:04:11,621
Я просто опять хочу
быть женатым.
54
00:04:15,802 --> 00:04:19,431
А я просто хочу
миллион долларов!
55
00:04:23,076 --> 00:04:26,773
- Рэйчел?
- Моника! Слава Богу!
56
00:04:27,180 --> 00:04:29,011
А я зашла к тебе домой,
57
00:04:29,182 --> 00:04:32,948
...а мужик с молотком сказал,
что ты здесь - и вот ты здесь.
58
00:04:33,119 --> 00:04:37,021
- Кофе не желаете?
- Ей без кофеина.
59
00:04:37,691 --> 00:04:41,092
Ребята, это Рэйчел, тоже пережила
школу имени Линкольна.
60
00:04:41,294 --> 00:04:43,888
Это все —
вот Чендлер, и Фиби...
61
00:04:44,064 --> 00:04:46,259
...и Джоуи, и...
помнишь моего брата Росса?
62
00:04:46,466 --> 00:04:47,660
Конечно!
63
00:04:57,577 --> 00:05:02,241
Сейчас нам расскажешь, или
подождём промокших подружек невесты?
64
00:05:03,450 --> 00:05:08,251
Ну ладно, всё началось
где-то за полчаса до венчания.
65
00:05:08,455 --> 00:05:11,117
Я была в комнате,
где лежали все подарки...
66
00:05:11,324 --> 00:05:17,024
...и рассматривала
шикарный соусник из Лиможа.
67
00:05:17,230 --> 00:05:18,857
И вдруг внезапно...
68
00:05:19,065 --> 00:05:20,259
Сахарозаменитель?
69
00:05:22,636 --> 00:05:26,538
...я поняла, что меня больше
возбуждает этот соусник, чем Барри!
70
00:05:26,740 --> 00:05:29,607
Тут я начала съезжать с
катушек, и меня осенило:
71
00:05:29,809 --> 00:05:32,607
да ведь Барри — вылитый
Мистер Картошка!
72
00:05:33,279 --> 00:05:36,715
Он мне всегда кого-то
напоминал, но это уж...
73
00:05:39,085 --> 00:05:42,486
Короче, мне просто необходимо было
удрать оттуда, и я задумалась...
74
00:05:42,689 --> 00:05:46,352
...«Зачем я это делаю
и ради кого?».
75
00:05:46,559 --> 00:05:50,461
Я не знала, куда податься,
и хотя мы с тобой как бы разошлись...
76
00:05:51,131 --> 00:05:53,964
...но ты единственная,
кого я здесь знаю.
77
00:05:54,134 --> 00:05:59,504
- И кого не пригласили на свадьбу.
- Я надеялась, что речь об этом не зайдёт.
78
00:06:15,989 --> 00:06:20,892
Кажется, он купил ей орган,
и она от этого совсем не в восторге.
79
00:06:21,528 --> 00:06:24,122
"С тунцом или яичным салатом?
Выбирай!"
80
00:06:25,665 --> 00:06:30,364
"Я буду то же,
что и Кристина."
81
00:06:30,570 --> 00:06:33,869
Папа, я просто...
я не могу выйти за него!
82
00:06:34,374 --> 00:06:39,277
Прости.
Я его просто не люблю.
83
00:06:39,479 --> 00:06:43,506
Да, для меня
это важно!
84
00:06:45,118 --> 00:06:50,647
"Если я отпущу волосы,
у меня отвалится голова".
85
00:06:51,658 --> 00:06:55,150
Нет, эти штаны
ей носить не стоит.
86
00:06:55,361 --> 00:06:57,022
Столкни её
с лестницы!
87
00:06:57,530 --> 00:07:00,397
Столкни!
Столкни её с лестницы!
88
00:07:04,671 --> 00:07:07,299
Папа, ну выслушай меня!
89
00:07:07,907 --> 00:07:12,139
Всю жизнь все говорили мне:
"Ты - туфля".
90
00:07:12,345 --> 00:07:14,779
"Ты - туфля!".
91
00:07:14,948 --> 00:07:17,974
А что если я не хочу
быть туфлей?
92
00:07:18,218 --> 00:07:21,244
Может, я хочу быть
сумочкой?
93
00:07:21,454 --> 00:07:24,082
Или, допустим,
шляпой?
94
00:07:24,424 --> 00:07:26,824
Нет, не надо мне
шляпу покупать!
95
00:07:27,060 --> 00:07:30,325
Это - метафора,
папа!
96
00:07:30,964 --> 00:07:34,422
Он почему-то запутался.
97
00:07:36,269 --> 00:07:38,066
Слушай, папа,
это моя жизнь.
98
00:07:39,405 --> 00:07:43,000
А может, я просто останусь
жить здесь, у Моники.
99
00:07:45,111 --> 00:07:48,444
Похоже, мы уже решили, что
она остаётся жить у Моники.
100
00:07:48,982 --> 00:07:52,247
Что ж, возможно, это должна решать я.
101
00:07:52,452 --> 00:07:54,647
Может, мне не нужны
твои деньги.
102
00:07:55,221 --> 00:07:58,054
Подожди!
Я сказала - может!
103
00:08:05,265 --> 00:08:08,132
Просто дыши, дыши…
вот так.
104
00:08:08,301 --> 00:08:10,792
Попробуй думать о чём-то
приятном и успокаивающем.
105
00:08:11,104 --> 00:08:14,596
Капли на розах,
усы у котёнка.
106
00:08:15,041 --> 00:08:19,205
Варежки, чайник сияюще-звонкий,
107
00:08:20,046 --> 00:08:23,743
Ля-ля-ля что-то,
лапша со струной...
108
00:08:24,284 --> 00:08:26,013
Всё, мне уже лучше.
109
00:08:27,887 --> 00:08:30,447
Я помогла.
110
00:08:31,658 --> 00:08:34,058
Может, оно и к лучшему?
111
00:08:34,828 --> 00:08:39,492
Независимость. Распоряжаешься
своей жизнью. Все как у шляпы.
112
00:08:39,666 --> 00:08:43,796
И ты всегда можешь
придти к Джоуи.
113
00:08:44,003 --> 00:08:47,598
Мы с Чендлером живём напротив.
И его часто не бывает дома.
114
00:08:49,409 --> 00:08:52,071
Джоуи, перестань клеиться к ней!
У неё сегодня свадьба!
115
00:08:52,445 --> 00:08:55,608
Можно подумать,
есть такой закон!
116
00:08:57,717 --> 00:09:00,049
Я отвечу.
117
00:09:00,286 --> 00:09:03,778
Прошу вас не делать так больше —
звук ужасный.
118
00:09:04,090 --> 00:09:05,614
Это, я, Пол.
119
00:09:05,825 --> 00:09:09,283
О Боже, уже 18:30?
"Вбуззди" его!
120
00:09:09,462 --> 00:09:11,930
- Кто такой Пол?
- Тот самый Вино-Пол?
121
00:09:12,131 --> 00:09:13,120
Возможно
122
00:09:13,299 --> 00:09:16,632
Так твоё «ненастоящее
свидание» - с Вино-Полом?
123
00:09:16,803 --> 00:09:19,294
- Он наконец-то тебя пригласил?
- Да!
124
00:09:19,505 --> 00:09:21,973
У-уй, это событие для
Дорогого Дневника.
125
00:09:22,175 --> 00:09:25,611
- Рэйч, постой, я могу всё отменить.
- Прошу тебя, иди, я буду в порядке!
126
00:09:27,013 --> 00:09:30,414
А ты, Росс, в порядке?
Хочешь, чтобы я осталась?
127
00:09:30,617 --> 00:09:33,313
Неплохо бы...
128
00:09:34,554 --> 00:09:38,547
- Правда?
- Да иди уже! Все-таки Вино-Пол!
129
00:09:39,125 --> 00:09:41,355
Он продаёт вино,
пьёт вино...
130
00:09:41,561 --> 00:09:44,325
...или просто
всегда виноват?
131
00:09:44,530 --> 00:09:46,862
Привет, заходи!
Пол, это...
132
00:09:48,067 --> 00:09:50,592
...все.
Все, это Пол.
133
00:09:52,272 --> 00:09:56,140
- Вино-Пол.
- Извини, не расслышал имени. Пол, да?
134
00:09:57,844 --> 00:10:00,972
Я сейчас. Мне
нужно только...
135
00:10:01,180 --> 00:10:03,546
Уписаться кипятком?
136
00:10:03,750 --> 00:10:05,081
Переодеться.
137
00:10:05,285 --> 00:10:07,719
Садись. Две секунды.
138
00:10:11,624 --> 00:10:15,924
Я только что вырвала четыре
ресницы. Не к добру это.
139
00:10:19,699 --> 00:10:22,099
Эй, Пол. Даю подсказку:
140
00:10:22,268 --> 00:10:26,864
Ей очень нравится, когда ты гладишь
ей шею в одном и том же месте...
141
00:10:27,073 --> 00:10:29,906
...снова и снова, до тех пор, пока оно
немножко не покраснеет
142
00:10:30,109 --> 00:10:33,442
Заткнись, Джоуи!
143
00:10:33,947 --> 00:10:36,074
Рэйчел, какие у тебя планы на вечер?
144
00:10:36,849 --> 00:10:40,580
Я как бы должна была лететь на Арубу
проводить свой медовый месяц...
145
00:10:40,853 --> 00:10:43,185
...так что никаких
146
00:10:44,557 --> 00:10:47,617
Точно. У тебя даже медового месяца
не вышло
147
00:10:47,794 --> 00:10:50,763
Хотя, если подумать, Аруба?
В это время года?
148
00:10:50,997 --> 00:10:53,295
Я говорил о твоих...
149
00:10:53,633 --> 00:10:56,932
...больших ящерицах.
150
00:10:59,572 --> 00:11:02,302
Если ты не хочешь сегодня
оставаться одна...
151
00:11:02,475 --> 00:11:06,036
...Джоуи и Чендлер собираются
помочь мне собирать мебель.
152
00:11:06,245 --> 00:11:08,645
И мы просто счастливы,
что подписались на это.
153
00:11:08,881 --> 00:11:12,078
Спасибо, но я просто
побуду здесь.
154
00:11:12,285 --> 00:11:14,344
- День был трудный.
- Да, конечно.
155
00:11:14,687 --> 00:11:15,915
Фибс, хочешь помочь?
156
00:11:16,356 --> 00:11:20,053
Я бы, конечно, помогла,
но не хочу.
157
00:11:28,067 --> 00:11:34,028
Любовь мила, как летний дождь.
Любовь - искусства пораженье.
158
00:11:34,407 --> 00:11:40,004
А твоя любовь,
твоя любовь...
159
00:11:40,213 --> 00:11:44,616
Как голубь огромный...
160
00:11:44,817 --> 00:11:48,480
...что на сердце мне гадит.
161
00:11:50,957 --> 00:11:52,857
Спасибо!
162
00:12:01,534 --> 00:12:05,664
Я должен прикрутить какую-то скобу
к каким-то боковинам...
163
00:12:05,872 --> 00:12:08,670
...с помощью этих маленьких
винтиков.
164
00:12:10,109 --> 00:12:14,671
Здесь нет никакой скобы
и никаких маленьких винтиков...
165
00:12:14,881 --> 00:12:17,679
...и я ноги отсидел.
166
00:12:21,187 --> 00:12:24,884
- Книжный шкаф почти готов.
- Красивая штука.
167
00:12:25,425 --> 00:12:26,790
А что это?
168
00:12:26,959 --> 00:12:32,022
Я сказал бы, что это скоба
в форме буквы L.
169
00:12:32,398 --> 00:12:36,494
- И куда она тут?
- Понятия не имею.
170
00:12:38,438 --> 00:12:41,669
- Всё, книжный шкаф готов.
- Всё готово.
171
00:12:44,911 --> 00:12:48,039
Это было любимое
пиво Кэрол.
172
00:12:48,981 --> 00:12:52,883
Она пила его прямо из банки.
Мне следовало догадаться.
173
00:12:56,322 --> 00:13:01,521
- Только начни, и мы сваливаем отсюда.
- Пожалуйста, не порти нам всё веселье.
174
00:13:01,727 --> 00:13:03,126
Можно задать
тебе вопрос?
175
00:13:03,329 --> 00:13:07,663
Она забрала мебель, стерео
и хороший телевизор.
176
00:13:07,867 --> 00:13:09,698
Что получил
ты?
177
00:13:09,902 --> 00:13:12,996
- Вас, ребята.
- Тебя нажгли.
178
00:13:13,172 --> 00:13:17,768
- О Господи!
- Я знаю, я конченый идиот.
179
00:13:17,977 --> 00:13:22,539
Должен был сразу догадаться, когда она
стала по 5 раз в неделю ходить к зубному.
180
00:13:22,748 --> 00:13:25,080
В конце концов, какими же
белыми могут быть зубы?
181
00:13:25,284 --> 00:13:27,616
Мой брат сейчас всё
это переживает.
182
00:13:27,820 --> 00:13:29,344
А как ты взял
себя в руки?
183
00:13:29,622 --> 00:13:33,080
Ему стоит случайно сломать
что-нибудь ценное из ее вещей.
184
00:13:33,259 --> 00:13:34,886
- Скажем, её...
- Ногу?
185
00:13:35,094 --> 00:13:38,996
А что, это мысль.
Но я ограничился часами.
186
00:13:39,632 --> 00:13:42,157
Ты правда разбил
её часы?
187
00:13:42,368 --> 00:13:46,600
Худшее, что сделала я - в клочья разорвала
любимое банное полотенце бывшего парня.
188
00:13:46,806 --> 00:13:50,367
- От тебя надо держаться подальше.
- Вот именно.
189
00:13:50,977 --> 00:13:53,946
Барри, прости меня.
Прости!
190
00:13:54,213 --> 00:13:59,583
Ты не думай, я это не из-за того,
что ты занимался любовью в носках.
191
00:13:59,785 --> 00:14:02,583
Дело во мне. Я просто...
192
00:14:09,128 --> 00:14:12,154
Привет, автоответчик опять
отрубился. Так вот...
193
00:14:17,036 --> 00:14:21,996
Я знаю, что какой-нибудь девушке
невероятно повезёт стать миссис Барри Финкел.
194
00:14:22,208 --> 00:14:25,939
Но не мне.
Нет, не мне.
195
00:14:26,145 --> 00:14:30,582
Я сейчас и сама не знаю, кто такая "я",
но дай мне хотя бы шанс понять...
196
00:14:33,052 --> 00:14:34,610
Я разведён!
197
00:14:34,820 --> 00:14:40,952
- Мне всего 26, и я разведён!
- Заткнись!
198
00:14:45,598 --> 00:14:47,964
Я собирал это
всего час.
199
00:14:48,968 --> 00:14:55,203
У нас не было ни одного романа,
который бы длился дольше ириски.
200
00:14:56,943 --> 00:15:00,310
А ты наслаждался
любовью женщины 4 года.
201
00:15:00,513 --> 00:15:05,815
4 года близости и доверия, пока она
не порезала твоё сердце на ленточки.
202
00:15:06,018 --> 00:15:09,010
Вот поэтому мы
так и не делаем!
203
00:15:09,922 --> 00:15:13,358
Но я, кажется, вёл
не к этому!
204
00:15:13,559 --> 00:15:17,689
Знаете, что самое страшное? Что если
каждому предназначена только 1 женщина?
205
00:15:17,897 --> 00:15:21,025
Что если у тебя есть
только 1 женщина, и всё?
206
00:15:21,234 --> 00:15:26,171
К сожалению, в моём случае эта
единственная женщина досталась ей.
207
00:15:28,140 --> 00:15:31,439
Что ты несешь?
Одна женщина?!
208
00:15:32,111 --> 00:15:35,638
Это всё равно что сказать: каждому
предназначен один сорт мороженого.
209
00:15:35,815 --> 00:15:39,979
Вот что я тебе скажу:
сортов же полно.
210
00:15:40,152 --> 00:15:44,248
Шоколадное, с шоколадной крошкой,
и бац! - вишнево-ванильное.
211
00:15:45,091 --> 00:15:49,391
Можно заказать с посыпкой,
с орехами или взбитыми сливками
212
00:15:49,862 --> 00:15:52,422
Это лучшее, что с
тобой случалось!
213
00:15:52,632 --> 00:15:56,466
Вот ты женился. Тебе сколько
лет было, восемь?
214
00:15:57,370 --> 00:16:01,272
С возвращением в мир!
Хватай ложку!
215
00:16:01,607 --> 00:16:05,839
- Я уже и не знаю, голоден я или возбуждён.
- Тогда не лезь к моему холодильнику.
216
00:16:10,049 --> 00:16:13,143
С тех пор, как она
от меня ушла, я...
217
00:16:13,653 --> 00:16:15,587
Что? Что?
218
00:16:15,788 --> 00:16:18,222
Ты хочешь что-то
мне сказать макаронами?
219
00:16:18,424 --> 00:16:23,157
Нет, это скорее откровение
для пятого свидания
220
00:16:23,362 --> 00:16:27,856
То есть будет и пятое свидание?
221
00:16:28,034 --> 00:16:29,661
А разве нет?
222
00:16:29,869 --> 00:16:32,099
Да, я думаю, будет
223
00:16:33,773 --> 00:16:37,072
Так что ты говорил?
224
00:16:40,579 --> 00:16:43,742
С тех пор, как она от меня ушла...
225
00:16:43,916 --> 00:16:46,714
...я был ни на что не способен...
226
00:16:47,420 --> 00:16:49,251
...в сексуальном смысле
227
00:16:51,524 --> 00:16:54,459
О боже! Боже мой!
Извини, ради бога
228
00:16:54,627 --> 00:16:59,064
Быть оплеванным - это не совсем то,
что тебе сейчас нужно
229
00:17:00,599 --> 00:17:02,066
И как долго?
230
00:17:02,268 --> 00:17:05,362
Два года.
231
00:17:05,571 --> 00:17:09,439
Как я рада, что ты разбил ее часы
232
00:17:10,343 --> 00:17:15,337
Так ты все еще хочешь пятого свидания?
233
00:17:16,849 --> 00:17:21,081
Да, хочу
234
00:17:21,620 --> 00:17:26,455
Мы собрались здесь, чтобы соединить
Джоани Луизу Каннингем...
235
00:17:26,659 --> 00:17:31,995
...и Чарльза.
Чачи Чачи Чачи...
236
00:17:32,732 --> 00:17:36,828
...узами священного брака
237
00:17:37,069 --> 00:17:38,127
- Брак - это наиболее святое...
- Но послушайте!
238
00:17:38,337 --> 00:17:44,333
Джоани любит Чачи!
В этом-то и разница
239
00:17:45,211 --> 00:17:47,042
"Хватай ложку"!
240
00:17:47,246 --> 00:17:50,579
Знаете, сколько времени
я уже не хватал ложку?
241
00:17:50,916 --> 00:17:55,285
Слова песни 70-х "Billy, don't be a hero"
вам о чём-нибудь скажут?
242
00:17:58,891 --> 00:18:01,985
Классная история,
но мне пора.
243
00:18:02,194 --> 00:18:07,029
У меня свидание с Эндрией.
Энжелой... Эндрией... Вот блин!
244
00:18:07,233 --> 00:18:10,634
Эндрия кричит в постели.
У Энжелы есть кошки.
245
00:18:10,803 --> 00:18:15,467
Точно, спасибо. Это Джули.
Все, я пошел.
246
00:18:17,042 --> 00:18:21,342
Дело вот в чём. Даже если я смогу
собрать всё свое мужество...
247
00:18:21,580 --> 00:18:24,174
...и пригласить девушку
на свидание...
248
00:18:24,383 --> 00:18:26,044
...кого мне
приглашать-то?
249
00:18:50,342 --> 00:18:53,971
Разве не поразительно?
Я впервые в жизни сварила кофе.
250
00:18:54,346 --> 00:18:56,678
- Это поразительно.
- Мои поздравления.
251
00:18:57,049 --> 00:19:00,780
Я подумала, если я смогу
сделать кофе, то смогу всё.
252
00:19:01,387 --> 00:19:06,518
А я думал, там было: "Если я смогу
оккупировать Польшу, то смогу всё".
253
00:19:06,692 --> 00:19:11,356
Но если чувствуешь, что хочешь сделать
ещё и ковбойский омлет или типа того...
254
00:19:14,300 --> 00:19:17,758
Хотя, в общем-то, я не
так уж и голоден.
255
00:19:18,971 --> 00:19:22,407
Какое счастье.
Ленни и Сквигги тут.
256
00:19:22,908 --> 00:19:24,967
- Доброе утро.
- Доброе утро.
257
00:19:26,946 --> 00:19:28,846
- Доброе утро.
- Доброе утро, Пол.
258
00:19:29,181 --> 00:19:32,014
- Здравствуй, Пол.
- Привет. Пол, кажется?
259
00:19:39,058 --> 00:19:42,027
- Спасибо. Огромное тебе спасибо.
- Прекрати!
260
00:19:42,194 --> 00:19:46,722
Прошлая ночь была похожа
на все мои дни рождения, выпускные...
261
00:19:46,932 --> 00:19:49,457
...и сцену постройки амбара из
"Свидетеля" ("Witness", 1985).
262
00:19:55,374 --> 00:19:56,773
Потом
поговорим.
263
00:20:02,081 --> 00:20:03,776
Спасибо.
264
00:20:10,856 --> 00:20:14,155
И это было
ненастоящее свидание.
265
00:20:14,360 --> 00:20:17,591
А чем же ты тогда занимаешься
на настоящем свидании?
266
00:20:18,631 --> 00:20:21,623
Заткнитесь и поставьте
мой стол на место.
267
00:20:22,301 --> 00:20:24,201
Ну все, детки,
мне пора на работу.
268
00:20:24,370 --> 00:20:29,899
Если я не введу в компьютер
те цифры… никто и не заметит.
269
00:20:32,945 --> 00:20:35,539
Так вы, ребята, все
как бы работаете?
270
00:20:36,782 --> 00:20:41,344
Ну да, мы все работаем.
Это наш способ покупать разные вещи.
271
00:20:43,489 --> 00:20:47,619
- Ага, вот я — актер.
- Я видела тебя где-то?
272
00:20:47,793 --> 00:20:50,159
Вряд ли.
Я всё больше на гастролях.
273
00:20:50,362 --> 00:20:53,820
Нет, погоди-ка — может, ты видела
детскую постановку «Пиноккио»...
274
00:20:54,033 --> 00:20:56,831
...в маленьком театре
в городском парке?
275
00:20:57,236 --> 00:20:58,567
Это была
просто работа!
276
00:20:58,938 --> 00:21:01,566
«Джепетто,
я настоящий, живой мальчик!».
277
00:21:04,343 --> 00:21:08,109
- Вам не удастся унизить художника.
- Ты прав, извини.
278
00:21:08,380 --> 00:21:11,042
Когда я деревянным был,
я в школу не ходил.
279
00:21:13,485 --> 00:21:17,683
Вам обоим следует знать,
что он - покойник.
280
00:21:17,856 --> 00:21:19,824
Эй, Чендлер!
281
00:21:22,261 --> 00:21:24,559
Как ты сегодня?
Спала хорошо?
282
00:21:24,763 --> 00:21:28,665
Говорила с Барри? Извини,
никак не могу согнать улыбку.
283
00:21:28,867 --> 00:21:33,395
Сама вижу. Похоже будто ты
спала с вешалкой во рту.
284
00:21:38,077 --> 00:21:41,205
Знаю, он просто
такой, такой...
285
00:21:41,714 --> 00:21:44,444
- Помнишь, как было у тебя с Тони Де Марко?
- Ну ещё бы.
286
00:21:44,650 --> 00:21:48,381
Ну, всё как у вас.
Только с чувствами.
287
00:21:49,254 --> 00:21:52,223
- Ого, так ты влипла!.
- Ещё как!
288
00:21:52,725 --> 00:21:55,990
Хочешь свадебное платье?
Почти новое.
289
00:21:56,195 --> 00:21:59,756
По-моему, здесь мы немного
забегаем вперёд.
290
00:21:59,965 --> 00:22:04,595
Сейчас я встану, пойду на работу,
и не буду думать о нём весь день.
291
00:22:05,537 --> 00:22:08,438
Или просто встану и
пойду на работу.
292
00:22:08,641 --> 00:22:10,302
- Ой, слушай, пожелай мне удачи!
- В чём?
293
00:22:10,476 --> 00:22:14,879
Я иду искать эту,
как её... работу!
294
00:22:25,057 --> 00:22:27,491
- Привет, Моника!
- Фрэнни, с приездом тебя!
295
00:22:27,726 --> 00:22:30,889
- Как там Флорида?
- Ты занималась сексом, не так ли?
296
00:22:32,931 --> 00:22:35,161
- Как ты это делаешь?
- Терпеть тебя не могу -
297
00:22:35,334 --> 00:22:39,361
Я таскаю тетушку по достопримечательностям
Майями, а ты тут сексом занимаешься.
298
00:22:39,538 --> 00:22:42,701
Ну?
Кто же он?
299
00:22:43,075 --> 00:22:44,565
Знаешь Пола?
300
00:22:44,843 --> 00:22:48,210
Вино-Пола?
Еще бы мне не знать Пола.
301
00:22:50,749 --> 00:22:53,274
То есть ты знаешь Пола так же,
как я знаю Пола?
302
00:22:53,452 --> 00:22:55,545
Шутишь? Да он мне
по гроб жизни обязан.
303
00:22:55,754 --> 00:23:00,054
До меня его черепах 2 года
из панциря не показывался.
304
00:23:03,328 --> 00:23:05,888
Конечно это была его
фирменная байка!
305
00:23:06,231 --> 00:23:08,961
Зачем?! Ну зачем кому-нибудь
так на себя наговаривать?
306
00:23:09,134 --> 00:23:12,399
Полагаю, мы ищем более
изящное объяснение, чем...
307
00:23:12,571 --> 00:23:15,506
...«желание затащить
тебя в койку».
308
00:23:15,708 --> 00:23:18,040
Ненавижу мужчин!
309
00:23:18,210 --> 00:23:22,340
Не надо ненависти -
не загрязняй Вселенную.
310
00:23:22,648 --> 00:23:23,979
Может,
дело во мне?
311
00:23:24,249 --> 00:23:27,878
Может, я распространяю какие-то
флюиды, которые улавливают...
312
00:23:28,053 --> 00:23:30,749
...только собаки и очень серьезно
озабоченные мужики?
313
00:23:30,923 --> 00:23:34,222
Ладно тебе,
давай сюда ножки.
314
00:23:40,466 --> 00:23:43,458
Я просто подумала, что
он милый, вот и всё.
315
00:23:46,705 --> 00:23:50,766
Ну неужели ты сразу не поняла,
что это мужская байка.
316
00:23:54,179 --> 00:23:56,044
- Знаете, что?
- Ты нашла работу?
317
00:23:56,215 --> 00:24:00,515
Смеёшься?
Я же ничему не училась!
318
00:24:00,786 --> 00:24:04,745
- Сегодня меня высмеяли на 12 собеседованиях.
- А настроение у тебя на удивление неплохое.
319
00:24:04,923 --> 00:24:08,188
У тебя было бы такое же, если бы ты нашёл
такие сапоги на распродаже за полцены!
320
00:24:10,562 --> 00:24:13,622
Как хорошо
ты меня знаешь.
321
00:24:14,767 --> 00:24:17,292
Эти сапоги будут называться
"Не нужны мне работа и родители...
322
00:24:17,503 --> 00:24:19,562
...у меня есть сапоги"!
323
00:24:20,973 --> 00:24:23,168
- А чем ты за них заплатила?
- Кредиткой.
324
00:24:23,709 --> 00:24:26,371
А за неё
кто платит?
325
00:24:26,645 --> 00:24:29,375
Ну… мой отец.
326
00:24:32,151 --> 00:24:35,678
А разве это обязательно?
Я могу перестать тратить когда захочу.
327
00:24:35,888 --> 00:24:38,118
Брось, Рэйчел, нельзя же всю жизнь
сидеть на шее у родителей.
328
00:24:38,323 --> 00:24:42,054
Знаю. Потому-то я и
собиралась замуж.
329
00:24:42,728 --> 00:24:45,856
Оставьте её в покое, самостоятельную
жизнь начинать трудно.
330
00:24:46,098 --> 00:24:47,087
- Спасибо.
- Не за что.
331
00:24:47,266 --> 00:24:50,793
Помню, как я впервые приехала в город.
Мне было четырнадцать лет.
332
00:24:51,003 --> 00:24:53,870
Мама только что покончила с собой,
а отчим опять сел в тюрьму.
333
00:24:54,072 --> 00:24:56,097
А я приехала сюда,
никого не зная.
334
00:24:56,308 --> 00:25:00,904
И я стала жить с одним альбиносом,
который мыл лобовые стекла в пароходстве.
335
00:25:01,113 --> 00:25:02,910
А потом и он наложил
на себя руки.
336
00:25:03,115 --> 00:25:07,779
А я открыла для себя ароматерапию.
Так что я тебя отлично понимаю.
337
00:25:11,089 --> 00:25:13,683
Слово, которое
ты ищешь -
338
00:25:14,359 --> 00:25:16,793
"Так о чём это я..."
339
00:25:20,799 --> 00:25:24,565
- Ну, готова?
- Нет, нет. Как я могу быть готова?
340
00:25:24,736 --> 00:25:27,637
"Эй, Рэйч! Ты готова выпрыгнуть
из самолета без парашюта?"
341
00:25:27,806 --> 00:25:30,036
- Нет, я не могу.
- Ты можешь.
342
00:25:30,242 --> 00:25:33,336
- Нет, не могу.
- Ты сделал кофе, теперь ты можешь всё.
343
00:25:35,914 --> 00:25:38,849
Режь, режь, режь!
344
00:25:43,956 --> 00:25:47,517
Знаете что?
Давайте на этом и остановимся.
345
00:25:47,726 --> 00:25:51,787
- Такой символический жест.
- Это был пропуск в библиотеку.
346
00:25:58,470 --> 00:26:03,339
Если прислушаться, в воздухе
витает стон тысяч продавцов.
347
00:26:06,545 --> 00:26:08,206
Добро пожаловать
в реальную жизнь!
348
00:26:08,413 --> 00:26:11,644
Она паршивая,
но ты втянешься.
349
00:26:19,558 --> 00:26:22,618
Вот и всё.
Ты ляжешь на диване?
350
00:26:22,794 --> 00:26:26,958
- Не, я ещё посижу немного, и домой.
- С тобой все будет нормально?
351
00:26:28,767 --> 00:26:32,100
Эй, Мон, смотри,
что я нашла на полу.
352
00:26:33,005 --> 00:26:34,529
Что с тобой?
353
00:26:34,740 --> 00:26:38,471
Это часы Пола.
Положи где взяла.
354
00:26:40,145 --> 00:26:42,306
О Боже.
Ладно.
355
00:26:42,748 --> 00:26:46,081
- Всем спокойной ночи.
- Спокойной ночи.
356
00:26:56,128 --> 00:27:01,031
- Ой, извини. Бери, я правда не хочу.
- Поделим?
357
00:27:05,270 --> 00:27:08,728
А ты ведь, наверное, не знала,
но я в школе был...
358
00:27:09,107 --> 00:27:11,598
...жутко в тебя
влюблён.
359
00:27:12,911 --> 00:27:14,276
Я знала.
360
00:27:14,446 --> 00:27:17,506
Правда?
361
00:27:17,783 --> 00:27:21,310
А мне всегда казалось, что ты считала меня
придурошным старшим братом Моники.
362
00:27:21,520 --> 00:27:23,579
Считала.
363
00:27:28,226 --> 00:27:29,818
Послушай, что бы ты сказала...
364
00:27:30,028 --> 00:27:35,022
...и пусть моя ранимость не станет
сейчас решающим фактором...
365
00:27:35,667 --> 00:27:39,797
...как думаешь, можно ли мне как-нибудь
куда-нибудь тебя пригласить?
366
00:27:40,706 --> 00:27:42,867
Да.
367
00:27:43,075 --> 00:27:44,406
Может быть.
368
00:27:45,310 --> 00:27:48,609
Хорошо.
369
00:27:52,017 --> 00:27:53,951
Тогда, может быть, приглашу.
370
00:27:58,290 --> 00:28:01,691
- Спокойной ночи.
- Спокойной ночи.
371
00:28:14,773 --> 00:28:17,003
До скорого.
372
00:28:18,310 --> 00:28:20,801
Подожди-ка.
Что это с тобой?
373
00:28:23,415 --> 00:28:27,715
Я только что
ухватил ложку.
374
00:28:33,825 --> 00:28:37,989
- Ушам своим не верю.
- Ушам своим не верю-ю-ю.
375
00:28:38,163 --> 00:28:40,393
- Чего? Я сказала, что у тебя...
- Чего? Я сказала, что у тебя-я-я...
376
00:28:41,400 --> 00:28:43,925
- Ты прекратишь или нет?
- Ой, а я что, опять начала?
377
00:28:44,102 --> 00:28:46,400
Да!
378
00:28:46,705 --> 00:28:51,142
Я сказала, что у тебя милая попка.
Милая, но не прекрасная.
379
00:28:51,309 --> 00:28:55,541
- Да ты бы не распознала попку,
даже если бы она тебя укусила.
- Вот это воображение.
380
00:28:58,016 --> 00:29:01,281
Кому-нибудь ещё кофе?
381
00:29:02,254 --> 00:29:04,484
Ты сама сварила
или просто подаёшь?
382
00:29:04,689 --> 00:29:08,284
- Просто подаю.
- Тогда мне чашечку. И мне!
383
00:29:08,493 --> 00:29:09,960
Дети,
новый сон.
384
00:29:10,128 --> 00:29:11,390
Итак,
я в Лас-Вегасе.
385
00:29:11,563 --> 00:29:14,191
Мисс,
можно ещё кофе?
386
00:29:14,599 --> 00:29:18,330
Простите, не передадите
тому парню?
387
00:29:18,904 --> 00:29:21,668
Давайте, давайте.
Спасибо.
388
00:29:21,873 --> 00:29:24,603
Простите.
Так, Лас-Вегас...
389
00:29:24,810 --> 00:29:26,903
Итак, я в Лас-Вегасе
390
00:29:27,813 --> 00:29:30,179
И я - Лайза Миннелли...
|